I guess I can understand why we have wedding favors (”Thank you, Aunt Effie for forking out $25 on this lovely toaster. Here is a scrap of tulle and 0.25 cents worth of candy.”). I want to know why we brides can’t just consider all of the food we paid for favor enough.

I mean it! If I were to have a sit down dinner reception, with my 279 guests (what a huge list that turned out to be!), my parents pay about $15-$23 per guest to eat…let me do the math here… ouch! $4,185-$6,417 for food. Now why would I spend $2-$5 more for cutsie little wedding favors?

As you know, I am a huge fan of doing things myself. (If you didn’t know before, you do now.) I was watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding the other day and noticed that while the family is discussing the guest list, they are busy making the wedding favors. They were making them before they even sent out the invitations. Does that mean I should be making my favors now? I have 3 months before I get married. (Thankfully no, I am having a candy buffet bar and using that as my favors.)

I’ve never gotten wedding favors at any wedding I’ve attended. Is that a Utah thing? Were my friends just not doing it right?

I know I just dissed on wedding favors, but I think they can be so elegant. I just can’t afford to buy 279 couples cute little silver frames or personalized candles.

What do you brides think? I am interested in more than brides’ opinions; everyone has been to a wedding at least once.

There are 99 days before my wedding. 99!?

You brides who plan your entire wedding in 3 months are amazing, and probably stressed out. I thought I was doing a great job planning my wedding until someone mentioned food.

I have to serve food?

You mean more than the cake and candy buffet bar?

If I were having my “extravagant” wedding reception at the local country club or The Tuscany (which I think is gorgeous, but too expensive for me), I would know exactly which foods to serve. However, my budget being what it is, Linguine with Portobello Mushrooms and Chicken in White Wine Sauce are not on the menu.

Food takes up a large portion of your wedding budget and, with a small budget, the pinch is certainly felt. How do you serve affordable food that guests will enjoy and remember?

An average dinner reception costs about $23.00 per person, without dessert, drinks or cake. I’m inviting close to 250 people. Even if only 100 show up, that is still $2,300 for food. (Yikes!)

You can still have elegant food and cut costs

Some of the best ways to cut back on costs are also the simplest; time or day of the week, food, guests and help are the first things you should examine.

The time of day makes a huge cost difference

Brunch, breakfast and dessert receptions will be cheaper than dinner receptions. Dinner receptions include an appetizer, soup or salad and a main entrée. They can also be served buffet style. If you opt for a brunch or breakfast reception, the costs are almost cut in half. Even a breakfast buffet is more affordable. Breakfast and brunch receptions are served earlier in the day, usually before 1 pm.

Dessert receptions, and cocktail receptions, skip dinner all together. Dessert receptions are exactly what they sound like: dessert! Cocktail receptions are also very popular. These receptions feature appetizers, usually finger foods, and plenty of alcohol. Alcohol will raise the cost of your reception automatically, but may still be cheaper than serving food. Both of these receptions are held after dinner, about 7 or 8 pm for dessert and around 8:30 or 9 pm for cocktails.

All reception costs will be swayed either way depending of the day of the week you choose. Weekends, Fridays and Saturdays, are the most expensive (morning is a better price) than weekdays. Sunday morning is quite affordable, but if you want to have an evening reception, aim for mid-week. (Nothing beats a wedding on a Wednesday to cheer up guests’ weeks.)

Please pass the fillet mignon…

Yes, you should serve more than your cake at your reception. Why? Your guests are spending at least $20 each on a gift and they expect to be fed…something. There are several ways you can change the food around to save money.

• Rent a venue that includes the food in the cost: not only can you save money on food by using their caterer, but you will also save time. (Your time is worth a lot, especially as your wedding approaches.)
• Don’t serve the choicest “cuts of meat”: even if you aren’t serving fillet mignon or even name brand foods, chances are your guests won’t be able to tell that you purchased the store brand instead of Dole. If you insist on using organic foods, remember that you will pay more for them.
• Limit your menu choices: if I were to attend a wedding where filet mignon or lobster (versus chicken) was on the menu, I’d choose the more expensive entrée. Don’t give your guests an expensive choice; a vegetarian option and one other option, like chicken, should be enough.
• Skip the first course: you don’t need to serve soup and salad. Pick one or the other, or eliminate both and let guests fill up on your favorite snack (breads look fancy but are more reasonably priced).
• Serve only desserts: if your reception is later in the evening, skip dinner and serve dessert. You can even include your wedding cake as a dessert, using sheet cake of the same flavor if your cake isn’t large enough. You can include a chocolate fountain, which are fairly affordable now, and fresh fruit dippers for a classy treat. The fresh fruit will be a welcome change from the sweets that abound at most weddings, and if you want your fountain to be different, do something other than chocolate. (Cheese or caramel…Yummmm!)
• Go easy on the drink: this isn’t a lesson on temperance, but alcohol is expensive. If you do buy champagne for the toast, save the good stuff for you and your fiancé, your parents and the other special guests at the “head” table. Your other guests can drink less expensive champagne.

And, if you really want to save money on food, buy in bulk.

Trim the list

This is the fastest way to cut costs: cut the guest list. This will be difficult because you don’t want to offend anyone and you’re afraid you’ll forget to invite someone, but many of the out-of-town guests you planned to include will probably not be able to make it, especially the older guests. Send them an announcement with a personal note; they’ll understand. If you’re worried about the additional cost of announcements, remember that announcements are less expensive than food.

Getting help

Don’t think that you need to do away with a caterer all together to save money. If you have your heart set on using a caterer, do it! Speak with them about ways to save on costs. They’ve done this hundreds of times and are not surprised by anything.

The same applies to all of your wedding professionals. If they do look down on you for trying to save money, maybe you should check out other vendors.

If you’ve decided to recruit friends and family for help with your food you have found a great, but potentially stressful way to save money. For your sake, and the sake of those kind enough to help you, take my advice: don’t let them spend the entire night in the kitchens. They’ve probably already spent the night before preparing all of the food ahead of time that was possible. You want them to enjoy your wedding day as much as you do, so either find a lot of help and rotate shifts, or find easy recipes that can be made ahead of time.

Enjoy your wedding and don’t let your food budget stress you out!

But I don’t have to have a trendy wedding; I want a nice wedding that reflects my fiancé and I as a couple. But how do I manage that on a wedding budget of $3000?

Here are 5 of the helpful hints I’ve discovered:

1. Attend bridal shows: as many as you can. I spent all of January attending bridal shows. It is a bit of a time commitment, but if you do attend, enter the contests. I’ve won hotel stays and flights, jewelry and a men’s wedding ring, and I found a lot of great ideas I could adapt to my budget.
2. Call in favors: You can be a bit more tactful, but in essence, find out what kinds of discounts you can get on products and services. My sister is a stylist (wedding day hair and make-up is solved), my mom works for the county (I booked the beautiful Provo Courthouse for half the usual cost) and I am lucky enough to have craft-minded family members who have offered their services to help with the wedding favors and decorations, which bring us to…
3. Do-it-yourself wedding favors: by making a few items yourself, and letting guests make favors themselves, you can save a lot of money compared to the costs of pre-made favors. Candy bars are very popular and I’ve decided to use a candy bar as both the dessert and wedding favors. Although you can rent containers, I decided to bring my own assortment of clear crystal vases and glass bowls, as well as borrow from family. They will be different styles and sizes, but that will only add to the charm.

Tip: Not only can the candy bar function as dessert and wedding favors, clear glass bowls, jars and vases filled with bright colored candies and set on tables can pull duty as centerpieces. Just add a few favor boxes or bags to each table for guests to make their own.

4. Shop local colleges: I found the perfect invitations on a website for hundreds of dollars. Both my fiancé and I love them, but there was no way we could afford $200 for 150 invitations. I found an art graduate student from a local college and asked her about creating something similar to the invitations I had found. She did, and made a few artistic suggestions, and they look amazing, and they’re my wedding colors.
5. If you can’t buy it, have it made: I found some bridesmaid dresses at a local wedding store, and they were very pretty, but very expensive and in need of alterations. After a suggestion from my future mother-in-law, I found a pattern I loved and shopped around for a seamstress. I am saving a few hundred dollars by having the dresses made, and they are more than very pretty, they are perfect.

Tip: Although it is tradition for the bride’s family to pay for the bridesmaids’ dresses, you can give your gals the opportunity to buy their own. These are friends and family who want to attend and want to save you money.

As my wedding approaches and I continue to research wedding reception ideas, I know I’ll find more ways to save money, which I can pass on to you.

Next in the saga, I’ll tackle food, music, transportation and more….